“It’s a safe place for them and, you know, it’s important for them to have that safe place to vent because it can be an extremely difficult journey.” This is how Kathleen Boate’, one of the leaders of the Alzheimer’s and Dementia Caregivers ministry, describes what the ministry does for those caring for others. What can be a frustrating, heartbreaking, and challenging experience, caring for a loved one or friend with dementia, this ministry helps by offering support for those caregivers.
Dementia is the loss of cognitive functioning to such an extent that it interferes with a person’s daily life and activities. Some people with dementia cannot control their emotions, and their personalities may change. Dementia ranges in severity from the mildest stage, when it is just beginning to affect a person’s functioning, to the most severe stage, when the person must depend entirely on others for basic activities of daily living, such as feeding oneself. Alzheimer’s Disease is the most common form of dementia.
Kathleen says, “We offer a place for them to share their story, vent their frustrations, look for assistance, for guidance, and everyone in the group kind of bounces off of each other as far as their experiences.” It is a support group for anyone who may need help, information, or a listening ear. “Because the caregivers have loved ones who are at different stages of dementia,” points out Kathleen, “you can have those who have been through a lot of it and those who are at the beginning trying to learn what to expect. We in the ministry come in to fill in the blanks regarding education and gather information for them, and that’s pretty much how it works.”
The ministry provides a safe space for individuals to vent, free from judgment, yet with understanding about their experiences; to validate their feelings. They share coping mechanisms or techniques that they can try, or, depending on what the caregiver needs, sometimes it’s just venting to an understanding audience who have experienced similar challenges. The ministry aligns with all that St. Francis does as a parish and with the Franciscan ethos, focusing on the dignity of every person. “It’s a support group for caregivers,” adds Kathleen, “but even if it’s a son or daughter who isn’t the primary caregiver and is having difficulty, they’re welcome to attend. We kindly request that anyone being cared for does not attend, as it would not be an appropriate environment for them.”
Meetings are held on the first Wednesday of every month at 1:00 p.m. for approximately 1 hour and 45 minutes, although they may occasionally run longer. Meetings are typically in the Padua room, and in the summer we meet in the Founders’ room. We occasionally need to adjust meeting dates due to holidays and holy days.